Thrifty shoppers enjoy the thrill of the hunt

To all the progressive fashion aficionados in the U.K., they would be known as “hospice shops.” If we were to traverse the beautiful lands of Australia or New Zealand, we would undoubtedly be directed to what are commonly known to locals as “op shops.” For us simple folk here in the good ol’ U-S-of- A, they are known to many as thrift stores.

I mention their existence to illuminate a part of fashion history that warrants recognition; a part of society that allows ordinary men and women to loot like pirates and hunt like animals.

This is the world of chain thrift store shopping. Welcome.

Welcome indeed to the lifestyle of the not-so rich and famous thrift store junkie. I will here and now proudly attest to the potency of this social addiction by affirming that we addicts are many; we are strong and we travel in blazing heaps of destruction.

I have seen the aftermath of devastation. I’ve been amidst the looting and pillaging that occurs in the name of couture, the chaos of Haight/Ashbury on sale. I’ve witnessed the horrors that lay waste to the streets of Hollywood when stealthy predators go in search of curious treasures and delectable fashion treats they know can only be found in the unlikeliest of places. The maniacal behavior, the predatory precision with which a hunter devours the prey at hand can only be described as a glorious sequence of calculated chess moves, from which a bittersweet cycle of fashion evolution takes place.

This cutthroat fashion survival of the fittest is how we as human beings translate the hopeless wasteland of materialism into cultural superiority; a game of fashion victims versus fashion trendsetters.

For those not wanting to end up as the walking advertisement for fashion faux pas or on any sort of fashion victims list, here are a few tips I can suggest, if and when you decide to venture out into the jungle of thrift shopping:

Go as often as you can. The tricky thing about thrift shopping is that one day you’ll see something you like, the next day it’s gone. Unfortunately, that’s the name of the game. Unique things vanish quickly, simple as that. My suggestion, if you spot something you fancy, freaking buy it! There’s nothing more unsatisfying then losing a gem to bad judgment.

Second, take time when making a selection. Don’t rush into things or jump to outrageous conclusions when eyeing that perfect, trendsetting specimen. Take your time and clear your head, glory will come.

Finally, size matters. Because used clothes are, well, used, it’s almost guaranteed that the size written on the label will fit you differently when tried on. Take this into consideration when “eye-balling” it, and know that your best bet is to always try on your selected garments.

And there you have it, folks. Three tips that will forever change the way you maintain status in the world of fashion. If ever you feel lost, or unable to select the perfect outfit, let the mantra of the very wise Coco Chanel ring true: “Fashion is not something that exists in dresses only. Fashion is in the sky, in the street; fashion has to do with ideas, the way we live, what is happening.” To be sure, Coco, to be sure indeed.