Think about the young mothers this Mother's Day

Bridget Veltri
arts@mustangdaily.net

Mother’s Day is different this year.

For me, the Hallmark holiday used to be about going home to have brunch with my mom, or at least sending her a card.

I used to see motherhood as this distant thing, something that was a way off for my friends and me.

On Sept. 5, 2007, one of my best friends back home gave birth – at 19 years old – to a baby boy and Mother’s Day will never be the same.

Kayla’s pregnancy wasn’t typical. On the first day of her sophomore year in college, she found out she was two weeks away from delivering. Welcome to the “motherhood” – no time to rent; you’ve already signed the lease.

Kayla had no signs of being pregnant other than gaining weight in her mid-section. When she saw her campus doctor about it, she was diagnosed with kidney problems and given a prescription – let’s hear it for the campus clinic. She found out about her pregnancy when she went to her family’s physician for a second opinion.

Kayla pretty much went from dorms to diapers, though handling it beautifully.

She moved home – boyfriend and baby in tow – finished the semester and carried on with her college career, plus one.

Kayla’s story is by all means bizarre, but college-aged mothers are not very uncommon. We have at least one here at Cal Poly.

It seems that society still ostracizes teenage or young mothers, assuming they promiscuous or irresponsible. However, it’s not 1952; there really is no scandal to be had and it’s not much of a secret that college students have sex.

The reality is that romance happens, condoms break, birth control fails and babies are born. Whether it be in a delivery room or a dormitory bathroom – it happens and it could just as easily happen to you.

Kayla doesn’t fit the stereotype of teen mothers. In high school, she was a straight-A honor student, three-sport athlete and a homecoming queen nominee. She’s been with her boyfriend since 10th grade, and worked part-time while majoring in engineering during her freshmen year. If anything, becoming a teen mother has made her resume more impressive.

There is no college course that teaches how to be a good parent, but if there were, my buddy would have aced it.

Being a full-time student is difficult within itself; Kayla’s studying is now interlaced with diapers, bottles, tears and teething. How many “Poly dollies” can imagine that?

College life isn’t exactly conducive to being a mom or dad. Aside from day care services offered on campus, having a child and deciding to raise it comes with a lot of sacrifice. Parties and Pampers don’t exactly go hand in hand.

Kayla and her boyfriend have embraced parenthood as frat boys embrace naive freshmen. When I’ve gone home to visit, I’m in awe of her as she is two years younger than me and handling more that I could ever imagine.

When I complain about being tired from studying or partying I think to myself, “Bridge, you don’t even know what tired is.”

The judgmental looks my friend receives when she runs errands with her son irritate me. I wish people could see how well she’s done and how hard she works. In all honesty, she deserves a round of applause, not a dirty look.

For most students, having a baby in college isn’t ideal, but it isn’t the end of the world.

So this Mother’s Day, when you’re out to brunch with your mom or putting the stamp on her card, acknowledge and appreciate the fact that some of your peers are parents, and someday that you might be too.

And to the young woman that gave birth on campus, know that wherever you are, you are not alone.

Happy Mother’s Day.

Bridget Veltri is a journalism junior and a guest columnist for the Mustang Daily.