Ryan ChartrandDoing “it.” Bumping uglies. Doing the dirty. Humping. Sleeping together. Getting some action. Sex has begun to lose its meaning in today’s society. With all of these phrases to replace the real thing (having sex), are people changing the way they regard this act?
Sex is a healthy and natural thing, but the pathway to get there seems to have changed drastically between generations. A once drawn-out process of courting and waiting to get to first base has now become a free-for-all to the bedroom. In a college environment, sex is increasingly becoming a nonchalant act that carries little thought of what happens the next morning when you no longer have your liquid courage.
This idea of hooking up without attachment is a tendency both genders are susceptible to. While it has typically been portrayed as a male behavior, women are also jumping on the bandwagon. The media tends to show the girl waiting around for a phone call after “going all the way” with her latest crush, but lately many women are joining in on the “make out and peace out” philosophy often attributed to men.
As students enter their post-adolescent years, their environment becomes extremely sexually charged because of the newfound freedom. Alcohol seems to fuel the “make out and peace out” philosophy, especially within the first two years of college. But it’s not just the freedom or alcohol that powers this philosophy, it is also peoples’ needs and wants. In our modern society, it is more apparent that some people can successfully satisfy their needs without emotional involvement.
The philosophy can easily be seen in two common scenarios.
Scenario 1: It all started off innocently enough at a party. Jokes were made by mutual friends of a possible hook-up between “Jack” and “Lisa,” but little did Lisa know her heart would end up broken.
Lisa was the type of girl who took everything seriously, including hook-ups – everything occurred with reason and purpose. Jack, a bit older, was looking for a good time – not a serious girlfriend.
Their first hookup led to them dating. Everything was moving fast, but the feelings appeared to be mutual. Lisa let her guard down and fell hard for Jack. Soon enough they had their last hook-up that pushed Jack over the edge – he realized this relationship was too real. Lisa’s intensity got to him, which left Jack no choice but to “peace out.” Heartbroken and confused, Lisa couldn’t believe Jack believed in the hook-up and ditch game. Maybe it was her forcefulness to put him in a relationship or his unwillingness to give into his emotions, but either way their relationship was doomed to begin with.
Scenario 2: Girls just wanna have fun, and “Whitney” was determined to have fun as she headed downtown one night. She knew “Bobby” through a friend and couldn’t help herself from making out with him after a few drinks. Bobby had an innocent crush on her and thought this meant he had a chance with dating her, but Whitney had no intentions of taking this relationship past a single hook-up.
Needless to say, Whitney ditched him at the end of the night, leaving Bobby caught off guard. In an attempt to retaliate, he “defriended” her on Facebook the next day.
In both scenarios, there was a lack of understanding of where the relationship was heading. While some view sex as a meaningful act of love, many perceive sex as a recreational activity. It has become a casual encounter leaving many confused in its wake. The potential for pain and confusion brought on by the “make out and peace out” philosophy can be altogether avoided by one simple action – communicating. Being on the same page is essential for any relationship to move forward or not. This is not to say that the philosophy is all bad, or that being in a committed relationship while in college is shackling a person down, but that communication is key in having your cake and eating it too.
Jessica Ford is a journalism senior and Elizabeth Yi is an animal science senior. Ford and Yi are the love, sex and dating columnists and can be contacted at thenakedtruthcolumn@gmail.com.