Julianne Roth is a journalism senior and Mustang Daily sex columnist.
Bland, raw broccoli offends me. From its texture to its smell and its plain, dirt taste. But we’d all rather eat our vegetables than have to listen to a badgering doctor or nutritionist explain that we’ve been remiss and now are stranded in a nutritional desert.
The same process applies to sex talk. If you are a member of the sexual community, but refuse to participate in either private or public conversations about sex, then you simply shouldn’t be having sex. Fleeing from the truth about your sex life and the hard-hitting issues surrounding sex in our society — better yet, the Cal Poly community — is a form of sexual negligence.
And sexual dysfunction is right around the corner of this denial. You could say sex talk is akin to eating your vegetables — spicy vegetables.
I’m all about being appropriate, when it’s necessary
This column is not politically correct. Political correctness is another word for irresponsible silence. Political correctness will never find a home among words such as labia and scrotum.
But aren’t you thankful I didn’t say vaginal fisting?
Political correctness suffices when you need not anger somebody, but that is almost the last priority when writing a column. Sex talk brings up a lot of emotions (as I’m sure a few of you are experiencing right now) and is clearly controversial.
So, I’m going to tackle this the best way I know how: head on.
Sex is a human instinct. I’m a product of it and you’re a product of it. Therefore, I’m just a normal woman speaking frankly about normal things.
Sex: a normal thing
I normally despise redundancy in all arenas of journalism, but this is a relevant exception.
Sex is taboo in our society because of the fact that it is a very private thing, can be surrounded by strong religious beliefs and, some psychologists believe, that its primal factor reminds us of how fragile we are.
Often just the mere mention of sex causes people to uncomfortably wriggle and shift in their seats.
Despite this taboo, we live in a society that is very sexually explicit. Just turn on the radio or MTV. Every day, people are exposed to sexual language and images.
The juxtaposition of the stringent rules regarding sex and the public mass media sends mixed messages to our society and leads to social awkwardness. We’ve socially crippled ourselves from being comfortable enough to have a frank conversation about sex.
But some of us are addicted to watching it play out on the television or reading about it in books such as “Fifty Shades of Grey.” The food equivalent to this is something like a donut. It’s full of empty calories, which is fine once in a while, but it won’t sustain you.
People are flooded with sex from the media, but their minds and bodies are starving for proper sexual education.
Not anymore — at least not on this campus.
Is sex talk worse than violence?
Ever heard of the phrase “If it bleeds it leads?” I find it fascinating that journalists sensationalize violence. But there seems to be an unspoken consensus that it is extraordinarily more shocking to talk about consensual sex than to describe how someone was murdered or raped. An example right off the top of my head is the case of Dystiny Myers.
Now, I’m not saying sex should be frivolously and boisterously discussed anytime one pleases. There’s a time and place for everything.
Nearly everyone who picks up this paper or clicks on the link to read this column has had sex or will have sex in their lifetime, yet its discussion is faced with incredible controversy.
Sex taboos are fairly normal. They aren’t right, but they’re definitely widespread.
Associate anthropology professor Stacey Rucas was able to shed a little light on the topic.
“Sex taboos are common to cultures everywhere. Anthropologists have discovered that humans the world over tend to deeply obscure their most basic and animalistic instincts, such as sex and death, with overt symbolism, ritual and meaning,” she beautifully stated.
This time, you asked for it
Cal Poly students were anonymously surveyed by a marketing class last quarter about “what type of content (they) want to see in the Mustang Daily,” according to business administration senior Katie Russ, who is also the promotions director for Mustang Daily.
Sixty percent of the students specified they were interested in a return of the sex column in the free response section of the survey.
That being said, this is a college sex column, written by a college student, for fellow college students.
It is not to be confused with professional medical advice or written pornography — it is more like the love child of both.
Originally, this column was going to be about having sex in public, but we’re saving that one for later. Thankfully, anticipation can make the experience even more enjoyable. I thought I would bend over a little bit to the colorful critiques of this column and explain why there is a need for more sex talk on our campus.
Perhaps I should have used the opportunity to introduce myself in my first column instead of jumping right into the topic. I assumed it would be more interesting for people to read about sex than to do a kindergarten-type introduction along the lines of, “Hi, my name is Sally Sue and here’s a little about myself …”
Oh, excuse me — I just fell asleep. Unfortunately, juiciness is not in abundance this week.
Although contrition is also absent from this article, I wanted to introduce you to the girl who gets your panties in a twist each week.
This is not an opportunity for me to fulfill my allotted word count with my personal sexual experiences. However, I do intend to make these pieces fun — to spice up your vegetables, if you will.
My aim is to promote a positive sex life for every person who stumbles upon this column. And most importantly, I’m here to offer you part of your healthy dose of spicy veggies.
Feel free to email me or comment online with future column topics and ideas.