Happy November Mustang Daily readers!
Now that Halloween’s over, the month of November brings new things to look forward to: sweater weather, home-cooked meals for Thanksgiving break, Christmas commercials before we’re even ready to think about it and another tradition that college students (and a select few high school man-children) are celebrating all over the country: No-shave November.
For those of you who are unfamiliar with the term No-shave November, it is pretty much exactly what it sounds like. During the month of November, partakers in the event put down their razors and dedicate themselves to a month without shaving. I should clarify that No-shave November is generally for males, but I guess there’s no stopping females from joining in the fun.
I’ve watched plenty of people take on the challenge of No-shave November over the years — some successfully and some not so much — and I feel that some guidelines need to be set to keep the month under control. My suggestions are as follows:
1. Know your own strengths. Not all of you boys are able to harvest a glorious beard forest like a lumberjack or Albus Dumbledore. Some of you are still waiting for those patchy little hair plots to take off. And even though your voices got deeper and you finally outgrew your little sister, it still may take a while to catch up to Brian Wilson and for others to fear your beard. So, for those of you who only need to shave once a week or less, my suggestion is to leave No-shave November to the pros and sit this one out until you’re ready to play in the big leagues.
2. Listen to your girlfriend. I know the last thing you want is for your significant other to weigh you down and deny your natural-born right as a man to grow a beard, but trust me, nine out of 10 times, it’s going to happen. While many girls may be in support of the funny tradition, my suggestion is that if your girlfriend asks you to shave, you listen. Unless you’d be OK with her forgoing shaving her legs and armpits for the next 30 days until only a weed-whacker could bring them back to their previous state. Trust me boys, we’re all for supporting your fun and games, but if your girlfriend really can’t deal with your facial hair, think twice before you blow her off.
3. No mustaches. This one is simple. If you sport a mustache, most people will assume you’re on your way to your unmarked white van as you pass them in public. No-shave November is for beards. And for the record, Mustache March is never OK to celebrate.
4. Keep it clean. If you are one of the big-leaguers who can grow a full beard, be extra mindful of the etiquette that accompanies your newly-acquired beard. Make sure half of your lunch doesn’t end up caught in your beard, and make sure you don’t have Jack Sparrow-style dreadlocks growing from your face come Nov. 30.
5. Go big or go home. Lastly, if you’re going to partake in No-shave November, do it right. Don’t wimp out when you go home for Thanksgiving and the finish line’s almost in sight because you think Grandma won’t approve. And don’t spend the month looking like you have permanent 5 o’clock shadow — if your facial hair grows at molasses-pace, it’s nothing a little Rogaine can’t fix.
With this advice in mind, No-shave November participants, I wish you the best of luck. I hope you grow the fiercest beard you’ve ever had, and that you win any bets you’ve made with your friends about your beard or theirs. And even if you don’t, at least your face will be warm for the winter.