NBA: In Vegas to stay?

I had an epiphany this weekend that has put everything into perspective.

Not only should Las Vegas host every sporting event from now on, but every major event in the world.

After much scrutiny and long hard thought-out days by league commissioner David Stern, the NBA finally allowed for the All-Star game to be held in Sin City. This had to be one of the most epic weekends in the history of professional sports. More happened this weekend in Las Vegas than we can even begin to comprehend. Let’s just say every league would die for that type of exposure for their respective All-Star weekends.

NBA All-Star weekend usually means every freeloading fan, groupies, or anyone looking for action of some sort is more than welcome. The only problem with Las Vegas is it’s already filled with these types of people. I mean, you have more people who are trying to get rich off a quarter than anywhere known to man.

In maybe the greatest foot race since a man raced a horse on Fox, Charles Barkley agreed to race long-time NBA referee Dick Bovetta three and a half times up and down the court. Well, for those of you who haven’t seen Barkley lately, he’s weighing in at about 350 pounds.

Bovetta, by the way, is not just any old referee – he’s 67. It seemed like this matchup had more hype than any of the events. Everyone had been leaning toward the cagey 67-year old in a landslide. It was almost like people underestimated the heart of a champion. Oh, I forgot Sir Charles never won the big one. Better make that a heart of clogged arteries.

Barkley broke out to the early lead and had the race all but wrapped up. This was until he got cocky and started to run backwards. This is when Bovetta kicked it into gear and gave a last-second dive. With the photo finish, Bovetta won by a hair. Barkley then admitted to betting $25,000 a hand on blackjack (definitely a lowball estimate). Barkley then capped the night with a big hug and a nice man kiss for Bovetta. Again, this could happen only in Las Vegas.

Then when we finally made it to the actual game, one of the greatest performers in the history of Las Vegas showed he can still rock the house. Wayne Newton sang “Viva Las Vegas,” but no one was listening.

I think we were just so focused on how his face could be that orange. Was it really possible?

The game then happened, with more missed alley-oops than any sports fan could possible take. From the moment the NBA decided to have All-Star weekend in Las Vegas, the last thing anyone thought about was the game.

Kobe’s your MVP, congrats, don’t care. Where are more flying Elvises?

In all seriousness, how nothing serious happened to anyone of any importance this weekend is absolutely beyond me. Think about this: A bunch of young professional athletes who are millionaires, groupies, free alcohol and gambling in a city that never sleeps and still nothing happened.

I’m sure David Stern didn’t sleep well worrying about his players.

Or it might have been all those Red Bulls and vodkas. The latter is not likely, but if it were to happen, this would have to be the place. I guess it could only happen in Las Vegas.